#mini event: mock election 2024

[askrockandfriends]

"That would be me."

"You can't win on policy, so you're trying for physical appearance, now?"

"Villa... the candidate Junko pads her bra!"

Ladies, how do you feel about the 2024 mock election candidates? (Luigi, Waluigi, Aqua, Homer, Edelgard, Giovanni, Batman, Yugi, Junko, Kurata, Parallel Non-X/Parallel Dark Kitty) Anyone you're leaning towards?

"I'm voting for whoever has the biggest boobs!"

"Yeah the boobs issue has always polled well at the villa."

[askrockandfriends]

Announcement: Tomorrow, October 19, we will be hosting the first (and only) debate for the 2024 Mock Election! Do you have any questions for our candidates? Send them into the inbox and the candidates will field them, make their arguments, and their cases for why they're the best candidate (and the other candidates suck). Rarity for this is that the anonymous option will be open for questions! Rules apply, however: any anon hate will be automatically deleted. It promises to be a wild, fun time!

[askrockandfriends]

"Ha, you see? Even I have my share of supporters as well! In fact, for gaining Whitney's support, I'll even throw in efforts to make life hell for the vegan crowd!"

[askrockandfriends]

"I am once again here to endorse Batman for President. As President, he will clean up the streets, lock away criminals like Junko and Giovanni, and put public safety above all else. Join me in voting Batman for a brighter, safer tomorrow!"

[askrockandfriends]

"Oh, dear... they're running political ads again. Hmm... I'm not sure whether to go with Rock and vote Batman, or vote Edelgard... or just vote to re-elect Luigi."

"Criminals like Giovanni and Junko Enoshima only serve to endanger society and the very way we live. In order to establish a safer society and ensure people like them are put away safely where they cannot harm anyone... vote Batman for President in 2024!"

?????

[askrockandfriends]

Candidates, any last appeals before voting goes up in a few hours?

"Omoridotoritoribaro."

"Luigi is lousy! Let's make WAHmerica great again!"

"I am a goddess, ergo most fit to lead! Also Junko pads her bra."

"I'm not rich, a king, or a god. I'm a guy like you. I know the common people more than any of the candidates here!"

"Vote for me and let's create a more equal society for all!"

"Vote for me and let's create an era of wealth and power!"

"A vote for me is a vote for safety and security!"

"Experience matters in this election, and I have the most of it. I will rule with fairness and benevolence, as I did thousands of years ago."

"Why lie? I just wanna cause some chaos and despair! Who's with me?"

[askrockandfriends]

"Vote out that loser Luigi, and put a real winner in. Let's make WAHmerica great again!"

WALUIGI 2024

[askrockandfriends]

For all candidates, name one biggest strength you have.

"Edotototomitapitato!"

"Waluigi number one!"

"I'm a goddess!"

"I'm just your everyday family man!"

"I have proven leadership experience, unlike most of these imbeciles."

"I have the strongest vision of the future among all these candidates."

"I'm Batman!"

"I was a ruler thousands of years ago, so I have the most experience by far of all of us!"

"I'm honest, unlike these guys."

[askrockandfriends]

"Make WAHmerica great again!"

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=5JvwdyylTWQ&pp=ygUVd2FsdWlnaSBmb3IgcHJlc2lkZW50

"WALugi is trump

[askrockandfriends]

Waluigi 2024

Make WAHmerica great again!

[askrockandfriends]

"Luigi is a loser! Vote Waluigi!"

WALUIGI 2024

[askrockandfriends]

"An organized crime boss, a sociopathic fashion model, and a violent masked vigilante that patrols the streets at night... these are the people who say they have our best interests in mind? I think not. Junko and Giovanni are little more than criminals who have no business holding public office, regardless of power or status, and Batman? His plan risks policing the citizens too much and jeopardizing the freedom and liberty of its people. My plan is different, however. As someone who was personally affected by the injustices of our society, I plan to create a society where everyone, not just a select few with a magic ticket handed to them at birth, can live and make a difference in the world. With my plan, everyone will be treated as equals in the eyes if society!"

"So, with that, vote for me, Edelgard von Hresvelg, in the 2024 election, and let's create a societal revolution for everyone!"

EDELGARD 2024

[askrockandfriends]

"Because I have seen firsthand the dark side of our crest-centered society, and so as President, I feel it's my duty to change it! Change it before anyone else goes through what I went through as a child..."

@askrockandfriends

"For far too long, the needs of the many have been held down by the needs of the few. Those who have been preordained from birth to rule, thrive, and make a difference in society. Be it the Crest bearers in Fodlan, the "Ultimates" in candidate Junko's world, or the rich and powerful, the chosen few have shaped societies far and right, in much to detrimental effect on the rest of society. I would know, as I, too, have been a victim of a society ruled by the Crests. As President, I seek to change all that, and create a more fair and just society where everyone, not just the chosen few, can have a chance to live, thrive, and make a difference in their world. So, vote for me, Edelgard von Hresvelg, and let's create a revolution for all!"

EDELGARD 2024

Sothis stared in silence for the longest time, her brows furrowed. Edelgard was joking.. right? Right? It must be a joke.

“No.” An answer that would have been immediate had she not been so.. flabbergasted.

“What do you have against crests, my gift, to the humans that I have created long ago? If you want change, go to them directly as they tarnished my gift. Don’t.. don’t go this route. We don’t need another repeat!”

[askrockandfriends]

"Hmm... Election? What that? Does Buu get candy after choosing?"

Majin Buu asked Junko, knowing absolutely nothing about how this works.

"Do you get candy? Hm, I dunno..."

"You might get candy if you choose Junko."

[askrockandfriends]

"Junko Enoshima claims she's the most honest candidate in this race... but honesty doesn't always equate to being the most qualified, especially when you have an extensive criminal record that rivals that of the Joker himself! Terrorism. Destruction of property. Inciting riots, war, and violence. And numerous upon numerous counts of murder. These are just some of the deeds on Junko Enoshima's near-endless criminal resume. As president, she will continue those activities to the point it will cause the destruction of our very country. I know, because she will tell you herself that that is what she will do. Voters, is this what we want as President? Someone who will cause the destruction of our country? One uncaring enough that they will openly tell you they will do such a thing? Or do we want someone who will ensure people like this are put away and kept out of society until they are satisfactorily reformed into people who can coexist with the rest of human civilization? As someone who's dedicated my entire career to reforming the once-doomed and crime-ridden Gotham City, I will make sure criminals like Junko are put away and never again walk free until we can be sure their freedom won't cause a disturbance in our good civilization."

"This message has been paid for by the campaign to elect Batman for President in 2024. For a brighter, more just tomorrow, vote Batman for President."

BATMAN 2024